We can’t figure out when Tattoo Jew, a documentary- *ahem* – exposing the cultural paradoxes of inked Jews gets released, but we’ll keep you posted. Meanwhile, who out there has been under the needle? One of Jmerica’s staffers has a Star of David etched for eternity on her back; her mother almost fainted when she saw it for the first time. Now Mom’s just grateful it ain’t a bullring.
We think it’s pretty cool that University of Arizona’s summer league that includes NBA stars Damon Stoudamire, Jason Terry and many others play at the Tucson Jewish Community Center. We are also huge fans of former player, coaching prodigy and mensch Josh Pastner. Or maybe we are just looking for an excuse to blog our beloved Wildcats…
Rabbi Avi Shafran’s essay in Jewsweek on the rise in Jewish McMysticism bites hard at the L.A. Kabbalah crew, saying “the Kabbalah Centre has about the same relationship to the true Jewish mystical tradition as Barney has to Tyrannosaurus Rex.”
Watch for Barney bracelets on a celebrity near you!
This is going to be very difficult for some J-boys out there, but we must inform you that Tori Spelling is no longer available. The actress, mostly famous for being not as pretty as her costars on a show her father produced, married actor-writer Charlie Shanian got married Saturday at her parents’ home in Beverly Hills. Please don’t shoot the messengers.
True crimes ‘zine The Snitch has posted an excellent bio of Jewish gangster Meyer “The Brain” Lansky. The mastermind who helped another Jewish gangster, Bugsy Seigel, build Las Vegas to clean the mob’s filthy millions, Lansky always kept it low-pro and only pulled one 90-day jail term in 60 years of racketeering. Yeah, we know crime is bad, but we’re still proud to claim this cat who makes Tony Soprano look like the fat, stupid, fictional hack he is.
More Jewish Six Degrees: Our grandma, who worked at a bank in Miami Beach in 70’s, was Lansky’s favorite teller. She always said he was a perfect mensch, no matter what anyone said about him.
Congrats to Kathleen Reiter, the 15 year-old winner of the first-ever “Jewish Idol” competition, held in Montreal June 27. She won a photography portfolio to boost her publicity packet, as well as a demo CD from Junited Records. We hope Kathleen will inspire other Jewish boys and girls to keep singing, and may she never become as notorious as American Idol’s posternerd William Hung.
Yo, Yenta!
I am in love with a Jewish girl and Im planning to ask her to marry me. Im willing to convert and raise our kids Jewish. My problem is that I was raised by pagan hippies on a commune and Im not circumcised. Im 28 years old and I really dont want anyone near my weiner with a knife. Should I suck it up and plan to lose the tip? What is the Jewish law concerning adult circumcision?
– Unclipped Convert, San Francisco, CA
Yo, Unclipped!: Any man willing to draw blood for his lady is quite a mensch, indeed. The ritual of male circumcision, brit milah, is commanded in the Book of Genesis by G-d as a covenant with the Jewish people. Its usually perfomed by a professional penis-snipper called a mohel when a baby boy Continue reading
The Jewish Journal‘s Amy Klein drags us through the dating trenches in “True Confessions of A JDate Addict”. The essay runs way too long, but we guess working the 12 steps takes a lot of paragraphs. May we suggest JDaters Anonymous, dahlink, right after you fill out your Jmerica profile?
We know we’re really stretching the Jewish six degrees of separation deal here, but since this week we’re honoring the 50th anniversary of Elvis’ first single “That’s All Right” we feel justfied in mentioning that our mother knows someone whose family employed Elvis as their Shabbos goy back in the day. We even found an article to back us up!
Somehow, the thought of the King flipping on light switches and bringing in the mail makes us worship him even more.
Found one for all the horny dudes out there: Why Every Good Jew Should F**k a Shikse” on www.jewgoo.com. Mr. Goo, who presumably lives in an orthodox community in North London and is obviously not getting any, gamely suggests that a little free love would do everybody on planet Earth some good.
“The world’s problems have as their foundation sexual frustration, which can be remedied with hot, wet, inter-faith unity.”
He’s pretty obscene and enjoys being shocking, but it’s hard not to find his lampoon of Abraham, Father of the Jews, as a doddering schizophrenic just a little bit funny.