We remember junior high being divided into two camps: those who believed Rush was the greatest rock n’ roll trio ever to come from North America and those who listened to Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam. Twenty years later, our side still reigns as the high-pitched howlings of Geddy Lee still sweep audiences out of their seats.
J. celebrates Rush’s 30 year anniversary and upcoming Bay Area performances with an in-depth look at Lee’s (born Gary Lee Weinrib) Jewish roots. He grew up in Canada, the son of Holocaust survivors who, rather than clam up about the horror, taught their child to be grateful and free in this land of plenty. He says the inspiration behind

Read The Talmud and the Internet by Jonathan Rosen over the weekend. Generally, we’re more slackers than scholars, but this slim jewel (130 pages or so) weaves effortlessly from torah to cyberspace, helping us see that the “unknowableness” of God is mirrored in the astoundingly vastness of the universe inside these glowing screens. Just as a Web page contains words that link to other pages, each section of the Talmud leads one deeper and deeper into the ongoing discussion on the nature of God.
The Talmud, with its commentary on the law, the 613 mitzvahs and what to do if your neighbor steals your goat, made God portable after the Second Temple burned. That’s when we became like bag ladies, fanning out around the globe, schlepping everything, including our religion. The words replaced the actual place of worship, enabling us to survive. The Internet, though not exactly a holy place (we’re pretty sure there’s no porn in the Talmud,) is a place where everyone, even us wandering Jews, has a voice and a home. Rosen brings us back to what is knowable and true in perfectly wielded prose, combining history with deeply personal feelings about family and Judaism without getting too deep.
An excellent before-bed meditation or a two-afternoon beach book if you’ve already finished the Da Vinci Code.

Have you heard about the lady who was remodeling her bathroom in Wyoming and came across two marble tablets noting 19th century donor records from Cincinatti’s Hebrew Union College, America’s first Jewish theological seminary? A fine discovery for Jews of the Midwest. All we ever find in our bathroom is mildew.

Now we’re really farklempt. MSNBC reports that tattooed, Kabbalah-wannabe shiksa Britney Spears has hired Jewish L.A. wedding planner Yifat Oren for her November nuptials to deadbeat dad Kevin Federline. Though Oren specializes in upscale themes such as “Downtown Decadence” and “Asian Modern” for her celebrity clientele, she’s busily collecting burlap napkins and gingham tablecloths for a “White Trash Barbecue” under a tinfoil chuppah.

Thanks, Fiddish, for scoring this lovely photo of little Billy Gates reading an electronic Torah at his Chinese bar mitzvah.
Seriously, why is he wearing a tallis at a press conference about Microsoft’s plans to expand in the far East? No time to change from the yeshiva lecture earlier that morning? Or is it just part of his plan to usurp all cultures and draw them under his giant corporate umbrella?

From Web India: Madonna, who apparently likes to surround herself with fellow Kabbalists during her shows, gave away 50 primo tickets to one of her shows and was simple devastated that they were promptly put up for sale to the highest bidder on the ‘Net.
“Even the head of the Kabbalah Center in Boston, Abner Madag, did not lag behind, his web ad read: Madonna VIP tickets, best seats in the house. If you have been wanting to see this show, then this is the way. Enjoy the show with the best seats in the house.”
Perhaps Queen Diva Esther assumed that devotees of Kabbalah naturally would be devotees of Madonna, but we all know what happens when you assume (the old joke about makin’ and ass of you and me)…hasn’t she claimed that Kabbalah has helped her shrink her ego?

The Australian Jewish community is in an uproar now that Kraft Foods has discontinued its production of kosher Vegemite. Lovers of the yeasty sandwich spread have been hoarding the stuff madly, and as far we’re concerned they can have it. Vegemite is the most revolting substance created by man, made even more evil for its physical resemblance to chocolatey Nutella but actually tastes something like salty cat vomit. Obviously, it’s an acquired taste. Sorry, mates.

We mourn the passing of 3 year-old Chana Liora Rosenfield, claimed back to eternity by cancer June1. Her parents, Daniel and Halana, have organized a global appeal for special acts of kindness this Shabbat, July 3. May the family know solace in the lovingkindness performed in memory of this precious angel. For more information on gatherings near you, visit www.chanaliora.com.
Some suggestions for special acts of kindness: Instead of ignoring the haggard mother with her screaming kids, offer to help carry her groceries. Call your grandmother and ask her to tell you a story from her childhood (this doesn’t count if you ask her for money afterwards.) Stop for every crosswalk if there’s a pedestrian waiting. Be nice to the angry performance artist-type who makes your coffee, before you’ve guzzled that first eye-opening sip. May we all reap the rewards of a kinder, gentler holiday weekend.

In spite of every demolition effort of their cranky condo neighbors, the Jews of Canada can continue to build sukkot on their balconies, reports the Globe and Mail. Observant Jews build temporary huts each year to eat, drink and make merry in during the nine-day festival of Sukkot and aren’t going to let living in a high-rise dampen the festivities. Neither will they let a bunch of yuppies and corporate real estate jerks bully them into compromising their beliefs. We wish we could be in Montreal this fall to see the lulavs waving from the 30th floor…