Candles? Packed. Kiddush cup? Packed. Marshmallows? Already open and being devoured by the tiny sugar fiends who live here.

This is what you get when you send your kids to public school: Campfires and “Kumbaya” on a Friday night in the middle of nowhere. Oh, the goyim will get their Jewish education tonight, mark my words! Stay tuned for Why Jews Should Not Camp, Part 2.

Shabbat Shalom, all. Send warm, clean thoughts my way.