The father site of the Jewish blogosphere, Protocols, has disbanded, but those of you who would follow writer Luke Ford to the ends of the earth can now find him at Jewish Whistleblower, where he promises “accountability and transparency within our institutions and leadership.”
Whew, we’re glad someone’s on it.

Every Shabbat we look forward to shutting down the screen, turning off the cell and sinking into a deep slumber that lasts well into Saturday afternoon. But since there are small children in our vicinity, we always seem to be awake far earlier than our bodies would like. But Aish‘s Rabbi Noah Weinberg has made us rethink our perpetual sleep deprivation as a holy tool thanks to Way To Wisdom #19 (out of an impressive 48):
Bi-miyut shayna – literally “minimizing sleep.” The desire for living is the struggle against sleep. On a deeper level, it’s about waking up to life.
We’ll try to remember that tomorrow morning when the squeals commence. As long as there’s coffee, we can wake up to life, even on our day of rest.
Shabbat Shalom and Happy Night Four, peeps!
Link c/o That Yid kid who likes to rock, Velvel. Painting by J.W. Waterhouse.

From Medical News Today: The Human Genome Project has allowed scientists to identify disease-related genes endemic to certain populations, giving a future to the treatment and prevention of diseases like Tay-Sachs, a neurological disorder affecting infants that is carried in the genes of one out of 27 American Ashkenazic Jews.
Genetic studies over the past half century have shed light on Jewish origins, the relatedness of Jewish communities, and the genetic basis of Mendelian disorders among Jewish peoples. Dr. Ostrer will discuss how these observations have been used to develop genetic testing programs and identify penetrance modifiers.
We don’t speak the lingo, but we think this means Jewish couples won’t have to be so worried about “modifying their penetrance” to protect their future offspring.

After consulting her rabbi on the matter, Madonna canned her longtime manager and Kabbalah convert Camille Henry last week for having an affair with a Reinvention tour bodyguard, citing that she could no longer have such a brazen slut on the payroll. Henry and her paramour both had partners back home, and their boss, with her newfound commitment to faithfulness and monogamy, is playing the holier-than-thou card. She seems to have forgotten her own checkered past– anyone remember her trying to seduce a very-married, pre-English-speaking Antonio Banderas in Truth or Dare?

A grouping of waxen pop icons (no, not Keith Richards) over at Madame Tussaud’s London branch has pissed off Christian leaders who call it “worse than bad taste.” Featuring David Beckham and his wife Posh Spice (both Kabbalah converts) as Joseph and Mary, with President George Bush, Prime Minister Tony Blair and Prince Philip as the Three Wisemen and disco diva Kylie Minogue blessing the the entire affair as an angel, it sounds like all that’s missing is Gary Coleman as the baby Jesus.
The Kabbalah Center has no comment so far, but the Vatican said it was unacceptable to have celebrities representing the holy creche. Here at Jmerica we’re just wondering if it’s not too late to cast a scene with Matt Damon as Judah Maccabee.

With the smooth moves of a politician who knows how to handle fire, California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger joined Jewish leaders today to light a Chabad-sponsored chanukiah on the Capitol steps in Sacramento. Adam Sandler was among a few famous Jews out to support the Guvanator; can we expect a clever line about this historical event in the next version of “The Chanukah Song”?

Guess this guy loves Chanukah as much as we do! Gotta love the reaction of the two onlookers. Courtesy of bangitout.com, where some truly clever Jews have amassed quite a treasure trove of kosher comedy. Check out the top Chanukah pick-up lines (including Chanukah? I hardly know ya! and You make my shamash melt) which we’re sure some of you will put to good use. Also, the Eight Nights of Chanukah parody is not to be missed.
Get yer menorahs ready, kids!

Thanks to Judaica artist Marsha Plafkin, even those without sight can remember that a Great Miracle Happened There. This braille dreidel, aka The Braidel, is cast in aluminum and can be purchased for $18.
Says Plafkin on her site: Hope rebuilt, like Braille, requires not the eye, but hand and heart to see.
So now if you’re playing dreidel with your glaucoma-inflicted bubbie, she’s gonna know if you cheat.

Most recently seen as the one-eyed meshuggeneh Chief Bloomenbergansteinthal in The Hebrew Hammer, this tall drink of Jewish water was spotted by our favorite personal trainer Mark Lebos at World Gym in Marin County. Lebos reports that the film star, author and social activist pumps iron like a man half his age (he’s a handsome and distinguished 62.)
Also seen as the compassionate scientist in E.T. and an obsessed lover in Bitter Moon, Coyote (born Rachmil Pinchus ben Mosha Cohon) penned his entertaining autobiography Sleeping Where I Fall about his days as a ground-breaking member of the radical San Francisco Mime Troupe.

The super sleuths over at Daily Jews have revealed the identity of the clever lyricist of “Hanukkah Hey-Ya”, the OutKast parody that has every Jew shakin’ tuchus. We bow to the creativity of one Eric Schwartz (aka kosher rapper Smooth-E, who is not to be confused with another Eric Schwartz who wrote the catchy ditty “Keep Your Jesus Off My Penis”.)
Check out Smooth-E’s exclusive interview in SomethingJewishUK.
In our own attempt at a scoop (we found the info by revisiting the original site; musta been revised to accomodate all the traffic,) the Flash wizard who took Schwartz’s song and made it visual (we use that term “wizard” a bit sarcastically, as the video looks a little bit like something made an Internet vocational school) has been outed as well.