Okay, you Rocky Mountain Jews, promise us that you will not vote for Republican Senate candidate Pete Coors! Not just because he’s the (former, ha) chairman of a beer company started by neo-Nazis whose main purchasing base comes from gap-toothed, palette-less morons and 17 year-old boys, a corporation that has polluted the same pristine wilderness that it pays NY ad execs billions to associate with its flat, bland taste, but because he’s exactly the kind of complete ass this country needs less of in its government.
As you might expect from the arrogant son from a wealthy family, Coors believes his white, Christian, male perspective is the only way to rule the minions and therefore feels the need to educate those of moral deficiency. For instance, when asked by a Denver rabbi whether he’s be willing to accept different viewpoints on abortion, Coors proceeded to explain that “the Jewish view that an embryo is not a living being during its first 40 days in the womb” was at odds with his own position.
There is, of couse, no such 40-day waiting period in Jewish tradition. Two days before this, Coors creatively interpreted the Koran, which irked the Colorado Muslim contingency. And yet people believe this guy when he says his company isn’t dumping their nasty sludge into streams and killing fish? The polls show them to be neck in neck, but who would vote for a creep so meglomaniacal and sociopathic when his opponent, state attorney general Ken Salazar, seems like such a stand-up guy?