Once upon a blog post, I made a little joke about becoming a Hebrew school teacher. Well, I have some very scary news for next year’s kindergarteners of Savannah’s Shalom School: It’s you, me, the Torah, a coupla tamborines and maybe some warm apple juice and crackers if you behave yourselves on Sunday mornings, kidlets. We’ll get along just fine as long as you pretend I know more than you do. And your parents don’t read this blog.
At the risk of called out as self-absorbed by the big kids on the Jblog block (poor Amishav! What a dumb drama to have happen to the wrong person, but he seems to have handled it with his usual humility and grace), I need a little navel-gazing moment: At 25, I had a shaved head and hairy armpits, drove a VW camper and wrote a newspaper column that inspired weekly death threats. At 35, I wear make-up every day, am sporting something suspiciously close to a sensible mom haircut, drive a beige minivan and have just accepted a job as a Sunday school teacher. If I hadn’t somehow morphed into a responsible adult in spite of my best efforts, I’d beg one of you to come to Savannah with a stack of Charles Bukowski books and some cocaine and kidnap me for a weekend.
*Sigh* At least now I have a true reason to buy some of Susan Fischer Weis’ fabulous chag-themed Yontifications.
Yo! Yenta! Sorry it’s been a while chica! I see you’ve been keeping up the good fight down there south of the the Mason-Dixon. Thanks for the kind shout out. But just because you’re going to be a hebrew school teacher don’t mean you have to totally morph into minivan mom 24/7. I bet you’ll be finding ways to sneak in some african dance moves into that classroom by this time next year. Have fun! Working with kids can be great and I know you’ll make the most of it.
At 25, I had a shaved head and hairy armpits, drove a VW camper and wrote newspaper column that inspired weekly death threats.
Ok, I was going to make a snarky comment but you don’t deserve it. At 25 I never would have not said it, but at 38 I have a little more self control.
It is kind of fun to look back and see how life has changed.
If I lived in Savannah I wouldn’t mind having you teach my young’ns a thing or two about a thing or two. I just hope the uptight weirdo’s you hear about in the deep south don’t stumble upon this blog and catch a fit over your *creative* past. We’ve all been through those phases. I guess when you have to fend for a few kids your paternal instincts kick in and everything changes. Atleast to most of us.
“Well get along just fine as long as you pretend I know more than you do. And your parents dont read this blog.”
hahaha … my Nathan will be in Kindergarten next year!
Ami ~ thanks, man. As a matter of fact, I manage to sneak African dance moves into most everything I do, including shopping for toilet paper.
Jack ~ What, what? Make the comment already! I’m sure my husband had made worse – he loves to remind me that when we met I had the hippie/punk thing going on, but I tell him I now have clean armpits and almost normal hair, while he’s still losing his.
joe ~ I bet when you become a daddy you’ll still freestyle like a mofo.
Dan ~ Holy moly! Nathan’s not the biter, is he? (kidding) At least I know there’s one parent who won’t turn me in to the Savannah frum police…um, you won’t, will you? See you at Mickve Israel tomorrow night?
The kids are going to LOVE you! mainly cuz you’re still one. just bring the joy of being a Jew to them.