Our favorite pissed-off Jew, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, turns his sharp tongue on the nasty Jewish dating scene in the latest issue of Jewsweek. As many as 72% of Jews between 18 and 39 marry gentiles, which could mean a Jewish culture a watery as bad coffee. Every Jew wants to marry another Jew, but dating is a whole different story, right? We at Jmerica like to call the goyishe hotties “the forbidden fruit,” like the blue-eyed babe working at the coffeeshop who wouldn’t know a chicken liver from a pipik.
Shmuley says: “The real issue is that no one is attracted to their sisters, or even their cousins; and the Jewish men, who grow up and go to school and summer camp with Jewish girls, perceive them as relations while the non-Jewish women, by comparison, are exciting and exotic.” Marry your sister? Ecch.
He goes on: “But perhaps what has destroyed Jewish marriage more than anything else is the modern culture of available, casual, and commitment-free sex.”
Maybe, but you can’t get more available than married sex, and you don’t even have to pretend you’re really 5’9″ when your wife knows damn well you top out at 5’6″. We think Shmuley isn’t giving Jews enough credit; we may drool over forbidden fruit, and maybe take it out for a cocktail, but once we find the perfect kosher meal, we’ll always eat at home.